Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Highway to Hell



Highway to Hell
Not the AC/DC song, but the tale of hell on our highways.

I feel I must acknowledge that there are probably VERY few exceptions.


Buses 
Constituting the major chunk of public transport oft gives them the right to stop anywhere on the road. Leftist, Rightist or center, you dare not question them. More often than not they realize at the last minute to take a turn and of course end up taking a mute turn.

Bikes
Zipping across the roads at speeds not less than 90kmph is considered an insult. They have superpowers to squeeze through gaps which even mice would find daunting. Add the callousness towards traffic rules and the compelling need to demonstrate their dexterity in biking skills by driving with one hand, wheeling etc ,  you have a disastrous mixture for perennial accidents ready!

Horns 
Jarring sounds resonating throughout the road effectively masking the direction of origin. Best way to get on someones nerve on the road. The power of this is truly felt when the traffic doesn’t move despite the green signal.

Potholes 
Disrupts the social hierarchy of power. Whether you own a Benz or a Bajaj scooter or whatever be the horsepower of your ego, potholes don’t flatten. A scooter simply overtakes a truck by swinging left and the latter is left behind lagging.

Pedestrians  
Ever deaf, non-caring jaywalkers. Given that the roads come from the tax payers money, they somehow have it in their heads that they are to be proclaimed "kings of the road" and every one else HAS to stop to give them way!

Traffic lights  
It is hard to believe that these 3 small round lights can be such tortuous testers of patience. The mad acceleration to just make it to the signal and the cussing and the anxious wait that follows for the signal to turn green. Sometimes ignored by the users of road who seem to follow the lights flashing in front of their eyes.
 
Animals 
The roads belong to man and animals alike; Such is the reverence shown that, the entire traffic diverts itself to accommodate a family of cud-chewing buffaloes/cows out on their evening stroll. In effect the holy cow becomes the cop and the cop a holy cow.

Parking Facilities  
Eternally full and even if you are lucky enough to spot a vacancy, one needs to be cunning to snap the place. If you think getting in is hard, getting out of these is even worse. Searching frantically for the parking slip and cutting across lines of parked vehicles, you would heave a sigh of relief to be out of these.

Roads 
With the combination of all the above, they know no bias. These maligned roads with their potholes, manholes and speed breakers are strict enforcers of liberty, equality and fraternity. Also, they seem to serve those who stand and wait, the best!

Long live the roads!